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A Year In Puerto Rico

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When you are used to living in a certain bubble all your life it can be hard to adjust to a new lifestyle. Throw in military life and an island where they mainly speak another language and you’ve got a perfect recipe for culture shock.

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#IslandLife

Despite being born and raised in a strict Spanish speaking family, my Spanish is very less than. I can get my point across but not without making up my own spanglish words in hopes the recipient will understand me. Finding help in English is a struggle but it’s just the tip of the iceberg of challenges. I can bitch all day but I guess, looking back, it’s not all bad.

Gotta take the good…

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Lani & Julia

I can confidently say had I not come to PR, I would have never met the friends I’ve made or the memories. My year started off on the right foot with meeting one girl in particular that made the transition smoother than I anticipated. I was able to share secrets with her, start off my day with one on one chit chats before working out, find motivation to do things with, found a shoulder to lean on. The thing with her was I was able to talk to her and she would really listen. She wouldn’t wait for her turn to talk and she would just give me time to speak. Being military life, though, one of the rules are not to get attached to your neighbors. She moved six months later. Her leaving really affected me and brought me down but I was able to still slowly climb my way up to making friends. That I did!

While it took some time, I was able to muster up the courage to meet new people which lead me to an amazing, talented, thoughtful, and courageous group of women. Kicking and screaming, they forced me to get out of military housing and go on adventures. With the help of my loving husband and these women, I learned how to float, how to make homemade soap, hiked through a rain forest, dove into a waterfall, danced on a party boat while it sailed around the pier of San Juan, seen beaches so beautiful they belong on post cards, seen lizards right at my feet, and visited streets made famous by salsa artists. To get to these sites and experiences, I also had to (and still) deal with a few setbacks by living here.

… With the bad

As phenomenal as the sites can be, the roads are just as terrible. God awful. In fact, it’s the main reason the hubs and I don’t go out often if he has to drive. Me driving is not an option. Whoever said Massachusetts drivers were horrible has clearly never been to Puerto Rico. I had no issue back in MA but here? No.

There is no such thing as a single lane. Every “single” lane is a double lane – illegally. Do the natives care? No. It is terrifying? Every day. I thank God on a daily basis that my husband gets to work and home safely. Don’t even get me started how long it takes for “law enforcement” to arrive at a scene of an accident.

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Random black outs, lack of water, and inconsistent cable/internet. It hasn’t happened in a couple of months (knock on wood) but we have gone through a power outage, having our water shut off, and you can never depend on the internet. It was much worse a few months ago but it seems to have gotten better recently (or it just hasn’t happened). I wasn’t here during the drought which lasted a few months! Water was limited so daily showers were not available. I had a small taste of it and, no, sir, I didn’t like it!

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Any 90’s kids get the reference? 

That’s not all folks!
Regardless of the headaches, I can always depend on my little family to help me push through and be grateful for living here becaaaauuuuuuusseeeeeee

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I was able to meet and bring this little guy into a better life that is full of love, kisses, and warm cuddles. Chimi came from a physically abusive home at only 13 weeks and with the tender love and help from a friend, he was rescued and pitter-pattered into my heart. Homeless dogs (or “satos”) are in the plenty and so hard to ignore. At least we were able to change one pup’s life.

He became Potato’s little brother and her own “support dog”. She has become a little more social and a lot more playful since he’s stepped into the picture. It was love from the start.

More to come
I have about three more years on the island and the only thing I can do is push forward. Worse comes to worse, I’ll always have this picture!

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Don’t be stressed the fuck out

We are moving again and with that comes lots of stress. I’m trying to organize everything with time to spare so I don’t lose my mind. Whenever I do get stressed out and feel like I’m ready to punch something or someone, I try my best to do something else to release that frustration.

Despite my physical appearance, I actually find going to the gym very relaxing. I even went to today to relieve some tension and stress after not going for over a month. I was reluctant at first to cough up the money but after they allowed me to use their gym I had a change a heart. All I needed was less than 5 minutes of cardio to realize this does make me instantly happy and because I focus on my breathing, I don’t think of anything else. Of course, the perfect song playlist also bumps up the energy.

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courtesy of thick-to-thin.com

Speaking of music, sing your little heart out! I don’t know about you but I may not have the best sounding voice but I can belt it out – when I’m alone… and off key. I like to turn off my phone or leave it somewhere on vibrate and just sing along to whatever good song I hear. I’ll YouTube the shit out of lyrics, although you could get lost in YouTube and then end up watching a cyst removal and completely spend the rest of the afternoon being grossed out and intrigued. I made this weird, didn’t I? Anyway, honestly, I think any type of music will help you relieve stress, however, pick the wrong tune and you’ll be stuck overthinking the situation you’re trying to run away from.

Physical activities that do not involve a gym. I have always been attracted to rough sports. I did TaeKwonDo, Muay Thai, and paintball. Trust me, it will keep your distracted from whatever it is you need a break from. You have to concentrate in everything you are doing. In paintball, if you’re  not focused, you are going to get shot and that shit HURTS. Wanna know what happens when you’re not concentrating in martial arts?
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Thinking of something else and not your target in paintball?
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Shit is no joke. I have a high tolerance for physical pain and I got an intense adrenaline rush when I was running from point A to point B with my paintball gun. The only difference between martial arts and paintball is in martial arts, you are focusing on your form and how you are performing with kicks, punches, kneeing etc. In paintball, you’re on a team so the pressure is on. You can’t be thinking about what happened prior while you are on the field. The outcome are both the same, though: You get a hit in & it feels amazing.

As I write this, I am also comfortable saying writing is also an outlet. Fellow bloggers, I hope you know what I mean. I can always depend on writing to take out my frustration. I can sit down and start writing away, delete what I didn’t like, not worried about who will see it, etc. It’s like turning on a faucet, the words and the emotions just flow out and like the sound of running water, it’s relaxing for me. I’ve been writing on blogs, my college newspaper,  HelloGiggles, journals since I was 11 years old and it’s always been something I’ve been committed to. Just because I don’t update as often as I should, doesn’t mean I’m not writing in general. It’s something that comes natural to me whether it’s feeling my fingertips push on a keyboard or feeling a pen in between my fingers, it’s a calming sensation.

Finding something that calms you is hard, especially if you don’t have hobbies but don’t let that discourage you. Try different things and activities to figure out what eases your nerves. Walking a dog could help, too. I like to walk Potato and leave my phone behind so I just enjoy the outside noise and watch Potato lose her mind. Whatever floats your boat but I would highly recommend the activities I have done and still do 🙂 😀

The familiar butterflies

I have lost count the times I’ve gone to see my husband – to pick him up after a deployment or to see him at a port call. What I can always, always count on is the gut feeling I get. I get these butterflies. These butterflies are strong enough to pick my stomach up and flip it over but they are somehow light enough to flutter around their paper wings and give me a tickle that sends my breakfast on a fast track up my esophagus. My heart begins to pound as every second that passes while I’m behind the wheel knowing I am about to see my brave coastie. I’m checking my make up at any reflection just to recheck it 5 minutes later. You’d think I’d be one of those annoying high school girls who thrive on their looks.

September was the first time I got those butterflies. I was going to see him graduate bootcamp and he never looked more handsome. His jaw line never looked so squared but his 5 o’clock shadow at 11:00am never scratched more. I was intoxicated with pride. Then, before I knew it, I was picking him up from deployments every few months or catching him at a port call. I was drunk with fear. Almost a year later and those butterflies still work their magic and they have now become part of my routine of getting ready. When I’m done styling my hair, applying my winged eye liner, checking my constant low tire pressure, I take one deep breath in and I inhale the butterflies.

Maybe we still are in the “honeymoon” stage, maybe the distance does make the heart grow fonder, or maybe we are lucky. Whatever it is, both of us are happy to be in this bliss of love. I don’t know if he feels it (maybe he does, but that may just be the sea waves pushing and pulling him back and forth. Some people call it being “sea sick”!) but it’s a feeling I both love and hate. The only thing that makes these pesky butterflies go away is when he is finally in my sight. Once I see him the butterflies all gather around my heart and paper mache it. Every step he makes towards me, my heart grows and pounds harder. Then, when we finally embrace, my heart explodes with joy, sending those butterflies out like shards from a grenade.I can finally breathe knowing Christian is “Safe & Sound”. I can breathe without choking on air knowing he is back with me. I can breathe because I have my air back.

Listen to each other like it’s the last time you can hear. Laugh with each other like it’s the last time you’ll breathe. Love each other like they’ll be gone tomorrow.

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courtesy of PageCovers.com

Types of college roommates & how to handle them

Like most college kids, I had the fun opportunity to dorm my four years (four? Er, maybe five. Five? Six? I want to go with four years) of college. I had attended New Jersey City University in Jersey City, NJ and it was the best time of my life (next to high school, thanks to my cousin’s encouragement of constant underage drinking). In total, I had four different room mates: the Ghost, the Celebrity, the Exchange Student, and the Best Roomie in the World. I’m going to break each one of them down and if you ever encounter any of these, follow these helpful words of stupidity wisdom.

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courtesy of memegenerator.com

The Exchange Student aka Rosalie.
Rosalie was my senior year roommate and the differences between us were obvious and very immediate. She came straight from China, she didn’t wear make up until later on in the semester, she always happened to get amazing deals online, sex topics were off limits, and our lifestyles were just through the roof different. I can’t go into details since I don’t want to throw her (or any of my roomies) under the bus. One good thing about Rosalie, she was fucking fearless!  She saved my life from an angry house centipede. Apparently, she had never seen one so she was intrigued and actually picked it up with her bare hands, after it was dead. I nearly screeched but she was cool as a cucumber. I got over it quickly once I realized she isn’t afraid of bugs. She also introduced me to a bunch of funny characters.

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courtesy of quickmemes.com
Funny thing about Rosalie is whenever I needed help with certain math problems, she would even be stumped so I would tell her, “You are not living up to your stereotypes!” Seriously, I mean c’mon, I lived up to mine… I always cleaned!

If you ever find yourself with a roommate who is from another country, don’t be an asshole and when I say this, I mean, don’t push your culture beliefs down their throat. Not everyone is going to be exactly like you or believe in the same thing you do. If you are one of these people who enjoys shoving their ideas in the hopes of converting someone’s mind to what you think is right, be prepared to be “that asshole” everyone hates. Just be cordial, respect their different cultures, and help them out when they ask. The culture shock is real and sometimes overwhelming.

The Celebrity aka Carolyn.
My junior year roommate. Everyone knew her, absolutely everyone. Some people enjoyed her company while others were less than friendly. Any time she went out she always looked fierce: heels on point, tight fitted clothes, flawless make up, and a lot of perfume. Some of her choices of clothing were a little revealing for my taste but when she was going to church, bitch belonged in a Vanity Fair magazine. She could bounce from a hooking club promoter to classy chic fashionista. I had to give it to her, she loved dressing pretty. I rarely saw her looking bummy. I never saw her as conceited, she really dressed for herself, not for anyone else. That shit is confidence.

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courtesy of pininterest.com

With all that said, she was the total opposite of me lol. I wore the same sweat pants or literal boy length shorts, band t-shirts or any black t shirt, and awful foot wear.

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I basically looked like a dapper little boy.

Unless you enjoy random people coming in and out or constantly looking for your roommate, you may want to try and see who your roommate will be in advance. I’m a very shy, quiet person, and I keep to myself… unless I know you, then, I will be leaving my clothes at your place while I go home wearing some of yours. I don’t have much advice for this one b/c at this time, I was working and bribing my boyfriend at the time to let me stay at his place. That boyfriend was kind of an asshole. So, IDK, stay busy?

The Ghost aka Lynn.
My second year roommate. I rarely saw this girl so we never really got to bond… at all. I had just started my first full time job. Monday – Friday 9:00am – 6:00pm I was at work and was also a full time student from 7:00pm – 10:00pm Monday – Thursday. My schedule was jam packed and along with that, I was also writing for my school’s newspaper. Lynn was a music major which left her little to no time at all. We would see each other around 7:30am – 8:30am because that was the time we would both get up and get ready for our day. I would come straight to my dorm after class exhausted and she would come in around 11:00pm. The only memory I do have of her is when I unintentionally scared her by returning a pencil to her. GIRLFRIEND WAS SHOOK! I must have been stepping lightly.

This roommate was driven and there was no stopping her. If she seems busy, let her live her life, don’t bash her for this and don’t take it to heart. You don’t always have to hang out with your roomie. There were times we went to the lunch room together to get nomnoms but other than than, we were just busy with our own lives and that is okay.

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courtesy of memebucket.com

The Best Roomie aka Jessica.
My first roommate. I couldn’t have asked for a better roommate. This girl ripped me out of my comfort bubble within the week of meeting her. Seriously, we got intoxicated together, shared stories while using the toilet together, shared the same shower stall (the other stall was broken and there were only two shower stalls. We both needed to get ready for class and we had class at the same time… seriously, I don’t need to explain myself to you!), shared secrets, saw each other naked way more than we should have, and really got involved in each other’s lives. Had it not been for her, I wouldn’t be as open minded and realistic as I am today. She taught me we are humans and we should take advantage of the life we have and stop worrying so much about what people may think of you. She was there for me through my darkest time when my life way falling apart and I remember how vulnerable she looked when she actually cried over her heartbreak. We also had amazing prank wars that included lubing up our door handles, filling up condoms with lotion and leaving them by the door (holy shit, did that cause a LOT of stir), & hanging each other’s stuffed animals.

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Keep in touch with this roommate. Girls, I know we suck at keeping females in our lives but if you meet a girl who literally influences your reality and somehow keeps you grounded, WITHOUT a hidden agenda to knock you down, this is a once in a lifetime friend. I’m not saying you need to worship them or take every bit of their advice but keep an open mind. This will be the one who will probably help mold you into the person you are meant to become… and who will tell you to lay off the red Gatorade and Cheetos when you’ve had too much.

Worst panel at AnimeNEXT2015 pt. II: The rant continues…

Because I was so bummed out and disappointed with the Japanese vs. American Horror panel, I decided to go ahead and look up just a few facts just to show how easy it could have been to do the research.

Slideshare.net shared two really good points:

“After a while American horror films were beginning to lose their originality, it was around this time that Japanese horror took off.”

“Many Japanese horror films were known for their cleverness and restraint which was much different compared to American horror films at the time which focused more on excessive nudity and high body counts.”

That’s actually really true. The classic American Horror movies, such Freddie, Jason, Scream, Halloween series, all had one thing in common, a lot of white T-Shirt wearing, busty dumb girls getting hacked up. It’s been so over played that you can’t even yell at the T.V., “You dumb idiot, run outside! Not upstairs!” because Scream even made that mainstream! These stories have been done and over played. It’s a similar concept of pop songs; they have the same “why don’t you love  me?” vibe. It’s been done… but it is still popular.

“Japanese horror films rely more on psychological horror which is a staple of early American horror films such as ‘The Haunting’, ‘The Shining’, and ‘Poltergeist’. These films are often cited by Japanese horror directors as their inspiration. Japanese horror films use folklore, ghost stories, and tales of honour and allegiance. Many of these movies deal with the breakdown of reality, family, and the mind dealing mainly with the unexplained.”

Another good point. Revenge and honor are such popular themes in Japanese movies because it is part of their culture. Honoring your family may be the highest priority in families. If you bring shame to the family, get ready to be ripped apart… no pun intended… actually, yes, lots of pun intended. You will get ripped apart. Bring your ‘A’ game.

“Japanese horror focuses on using more silence and empty spaces to create a sensation of impending death and doom. Terror is created by allowing the audience to not know what exactly is going on in these films as people are always scared the most by what they don’t know or understand. The American movie Jaws uses this exact formula as nobody see’s the shark for the first half of the movie therefore creating both suspense and fear.”

My husband and I watched Insidious 3 a few weekends ago and this was on the points he was referring to. Not being able to clearly see what or who is going to attack is what makes your skin crawl. It’s not an obvious shape or sound, the unknown evokes fear. One minute you’re staring at a person cuddled in bed, the next shot is a hazy figure standing in the shadow by the window. When we are thrown into a dark room, we begin to freak out because we don’t know what’s around us. Imagine being tossed into a basement, too dark to see clearly but just light enough to see shadows. The possibilities of… things to kill you become endless, thanks to your imagination.

PublicAsian.com also  brought up a good point.

“The classic Asian horror films focus on psychological horror, invoking the demonic and the supernatural to build suspense throughout the film.”

Psychological horror will really screw with your head. It’s easy to say someone is stalking you, this guy is going to kill you, this girl cut me but go around saying a ghost wrote, “im going to rip your fucking throat out,” on your bathroom mirror with no evidence, be ready to be committed. No one is going to believe you.

Had they gone into depth about the differences and the importance of themes, the panel would have had a better shot of keeping everyone entertained. I could have just googled everything they said and discussed it with friends… after all, that’s what they did!

Worst panel at AnimeNext2015: Japanese Horror vs. American Horror

Last weekend was the annual AnimeNext convention. For those of you who don’t know what this is, it’s a convention held in New Jersey where all the nerds come and meet other nerds. My husband and I were part of this kingdom.

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My husband was Krieger from FX’s show Archer and I was his virtual wife.

Now, before you judge, there are some hot, and I mean, HOT nerds who cosplay.

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Courtesy of Cosplay Deviants

I try to be one of them. I had went for the three day deal so I dressed up Friday, Saturday, & Sunday. Along with cosplay, they also have panels and because this convention celebrates Manga, Anime, and the Japanese culture, I decided to attend a Japanese Horror vs American Horror panel. Now, I may have gotten the name wrong but holy shit, this was the least professional bunch ever. The panel consisted of three people: the token girl, the guy who should have been in charge since the laptop was in front of him, and the douche who thought he was the cool guy. Let me list the ways they sucked:

1. They read the power points. What do we learn first in school? Never read the power points. They are there just to summarize your most powerful points. Thus, POWER POINT, not, power paragraph. The panel read the entire Power Point and it drove me just to fidget in my seat like a grammar Nazi would if they had been reading a terrible essay… (or my blog :D). I felt as if I was watching a group project presentation from my classmates who waited until the last couple of hours before class to pull their shit together.

2. No energy. I get it was Sunday and it was the last day but c’mon. People came to see you guys teach us something. My husband and I were probably the second group in line and there was a HUGE commotion on the 50+ people line to see them. People were really getting upset that they weren’t going to be able to see them and these guys just lacked sympathy and interest. They spoke softly, lightly, and almost computerized… maybe b/c they were reading off the screen… It was such a shame and, frankly, kind of disrespectful. You have all these people here that wanted to come to this interesting event and you guys weren’t ready, looked like you didn’t care, and basically failed to deliver.

3. Speaking of learning, the crowd had more knowledge than they did. The three amateurs had listed a few American horror movies. They added “Nosferatu”. One knowledgeable gentleman rose his hand and corrected them by letting them know it was German, not American. What did the panel say? Good question, they kinda rambled. They also seemed to only know the mainstream horror movies but not others such as [REC] (this movie actually inspired the remake Quarantine). I know these aren’t American but still, they should have more knowledge about horror movies in general. It seemed like they only prepared themselves for just this event.

4. SO unorganized! I would never be one to say, “Hey, Stacey, you called me sassy during work hours today and I think that was highly unprofessional,” but if you signed up for this, this is your job, this is your assignment – be ready! Their PowerPoint was all over the place, they didn’t have their next clip ready, they would be taking about one photo clip but then reference the other. There were awkward pauses that made you cringe and just left you hanging. They clearly did not rehearse this. The douchbag to our right was just sloppy with his leg over the arm rest, dude, you’re not at your bro’s house talking about horror movies, you’re engaging an audience. Thanks for sucking.

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Courtesy of KnowYourMemes.com

These guys (and the token girl) really ruined what was supposed to be an educational and FUN time. The only thing that was actually fun was the trailers they played off YouTube. To summarize the hour (or however that hell took): grab some buddies, watch some mainstream popular movies (Evil Dead & Insidious), watch the remakes of Japanese remakes (The Ring, The Grudge), and just talk about them. That was it. That is what literally happened. This trio thought they were bad ass and knowledgeable about horror but were shut down once the audience clearly wiped the floor with their shit. You know it’s bad when your audience is teaching you things instead of the opposite.

Why Caitlyn Jenner is important

We have seen her everywhere; she’s on magazines, TV, every social media, and even the news. You can hate her all you want but, clearly, she is here to stay. Caitlyn Jenner is on fire right now but she is also under fire. Nice pun, right? I just made that up on the spot. You’re welcome 😉

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USMagazine

You can bitch all you want about how disgusting she is, she is an abomination, there are more important things to focus on, and all your other complaining, whining shit but I am here to tell you, and try to convince you, why her coming out is important in this generation.

When I was growing up, I didn’t hear too much about bullying. In my opinion, kids these days are too soft but I will still stand for those who are too afraid to speak up. There have been so many suicides and too many kids being tormented because of their sexuality. Whether if they know they are gay or are still struggling, it is still an issue kids have to face with every. single. day. of their lives. Now, picture yourself, my sweet, little followers, picture yourself as a 12 year old boy. You know damn well, if you even stare at another boy’s body in the locker room, you are going to get picked on (or worse). You pretend you are one of the guys but when you are finally home, you can play dress up, look pretty, be comfortable in your own skin. There is a catch, whatever you do, don’t let you parents or siblings find out because if they do, you’re in a mess of a conversation (or worse). Now, knowing the struggles you, as a 12 year old, are faced with, how in the WORLD could this be a choice? There are so many 12 year old boys in this same situation. They are terrified of coming out, confused by what their real inner bodies are telling them. To themselves, they are freaks.

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LiveScience.com

Bruce Jenner, as we all know, was a handsome, Olympian athlete. He gained more attention when he married Kris Kardashian. He was in the spotlight but not as much as the rest of the Kardashian clan. To have someone like Bruce come out and say, “I am a woman,” this is a hero for some of those kids who, they themselves, are struggling with this inner battle. Finally, someone who has respect from (not all) the public is in the same shoes that 12 year old boy is in. This one kid isn’t so lost anymore. He can read and watch the interviews and articles and relate. If someone who is under the public eye can do this, knowing the scrutiny he is going to receive and the hate, this gives that 12 year old boy courage, knowing if no one understands him, one person will. It is a long shot but it’s worth a shot. When I became EIC of my college newspaper, I started to drown in my insecurities and I couldn’t find anyone to relate. After one terrible afternoon, I went back to my dorm room, stuffed my face with cake, and began watching L.A. Ink. As silly as it may sound, I regained my confidence through this show.. Not many people will admit but everyone models something after a celebrity. Fashion, style, strength, you may hate to admit it but celebrities do impact our lives. It could be in negative ways or positive.

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BBMLive.com

In Miley’s case… sigh, just no. Stop.

For those who are saying, “There are more important things to worry about than this,” STFU. Of course there are! Animal abuse, ISIS, political nonsense, human trafficking, the economy, racism. Are YOU only stressing and following ONE of those problems? NO! All you are doing is just rolling your eyes and saying, “WHO CARES?!” – Well, the GLBT community does because THIS is a big step for this part of the world. To them, this is what matters: being heard, the fight of acceptance. My husband is in the military and I have a huge love for animals but I even realize how important this particular subject is… and this doesn’t even affect me in any way!

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KnowYourMemes.com

For you bible freaks… Unless you waited to have any sexual actions with your spouse, never did anal, never cheated, worship regularly, and NEVER JUDGED anyone, then you have absolutely NO RIGHT or grounds to stand on. I cannot stand those people bashing Caitlyn for religious views because they constantly share their beliefs on loving thy neighbor, what is wrong or right. The part you hypocrites are forgetting is that NO ONE CAN JUDGE YOU EXCEPT ONE PERSON and last time I checked, none of you can walk on water. Who are you to judge what a person, you will never meet, you will never have to speak to, or have any impact on ONLY YOUR LIFE, does?! Worry about if your god will accept you into his kingdom knowing how you treated someone. You aren’t helping spreading the good word when you constantly judge others, you are just encouraging other people to hate your religion.

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BlogSpot.com

Unless Caitlyn personally comes at your door and says, “You have to wear men’s/women’s clothing because I say so,” just STFU. She isn’t hurting anyone and if you think she is hurting her family, guess what? You’re not part of her family because if you were, you wouldn’t be complaining. You’d be debating which country to visit next as a vacation. No one should be judging her. If you’re sick of hearing about her, CHANGE THE CHANNEL, SKIP TO THE NEXT STATION, SCROLL PAST IT. The negative comments need to stop. If you hate her that much, then just move on with your day. No one cares what you have to say just like I don’t care about your negative thoughts about my post. Move the fuck on and get over it.

Coming to Meghan Trainor’s defense!

Yesterday I read an article that was basically bashing Meghan Trainor’s All About That Bass song. I was able to also read another article that inspired the first one I read. I decided to write them in separate posts so I don’t confuse anyone. In this post, I am referring to FBomb.org article. Both are attacking the song and how girls are only validated through men’s appeal and that Meghan isn’t a positive role model. Are you fucking serious? Okay, you’re entitled to your opinions… let me give you a taste of mine.

In the article, Antonia Bentel writes, “However, I also identify as a feminist and am inclined to listen to these songs with critical ears, ready to pick up on any all-too-common sexist remarks.” Let me stop you there. I don’t identify as a feminist. I identify myself as a 28 year old Latina and I am inclined to listen to every song from a not-so-sensitive area. I’m not ready to pick up on any all-too-common sexist remarks because I enjoy having an open mind and  *gasp* sense of humor! So, you’re implying that you’re looking for something to rip apart. Next item, Antonia proclaims that one of her “favorite feminist musician” is Nicki Minaj and one of her favorite songs is “Superbass”. She went on to say that she would,”proudly rap for anyone who so much as mentions the song.” One of Nicki’s lines are “He ain’t even gotta try to put the mack on/He just gotta gimme that look/When he gimme that look/Then the panties coming off.”  So, it’s not okay for women to judge their beauty by men standards but you do support women not even needing a man to charm her, he just has to give off a look and she can jump in bed with him? Hey, I’m only doing what you said you supposedly do: listening with critical ears. That’s right, girl! Proudly repeat those words that mean you’ll jump in the sack with a guy just by giving you a look! And I understand Nicki identifies herself as a rapper, not a female rapper but she doesn’t get my respect…

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realtalkny.com

…Because she uses her sexuality to get fame… almost as if she needs male validation to earn fans through her beauty and body… Catch my drift?

Moving along, yes, in All About That Bass, Meghan does say, “boys like a little more booty to hold at night.” Girls in high school, in my opinion, have the worst time when it comes to body image. They think they are too skinny, too fat, flat boobs, too busty, wide hips etc. High school girls are not concerned with feminism yet. Most of these young girls are obsessed with their image because of boys. Get the fuck over it, feminists. Yes, high school girls may make you shake your heads but a lot of high schools do not go into real depth about feminism until college… therefore, these young girls mainly do validate their prettiness through the attention of boys. Oh yeah, and one more thing, THEY ARE GOING THROUGH PUBERTY!!! The opposite sex (or same sex if you’re in that category) only think about hormones and sex. These girls are going through one of their toughest times when it comes to body image. Most of them won’t be able to understand they don’t need men’s approval to realize their own self worth. Girls who are pear shaped find comfort in knowing, “boys like a little more booty to hold at night.” It is sad to think young girls have this on their minds but you know what? When I was 15 years old, I appreciated my busty chest because boys noticed me. Give Meghan a break, she is giving young girls a song to make them feel better about their curves.

On to my next point, I think you forgot a few lines just to be biased and prove your point. Antonia writes that Meghan “sang that she’s “bringing booty back…go tell them skinny b*tches that.” By singing these two lines, she degrades women who are naturally thin and petite.” That verse goes as follows:

“I’m bringing booty back/Go ahead & tell them skinny bitches that/Nah, I’m just playin’/I know you think you’re fat/But I’m here to tell you/Every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top.”

The way I see it is Meghan is calling thinner girls “skinny bitches” but immediately says that she is joking. Also, she could either be speaking to the thinner girls or the curvier girls with “I know you think you’re fat.” I have met many women thinner than myself and heavier than myself but I will tell them the same, “every inch of you is perfect.” But I guess you know Meghan was shaming the thinner girls, right? Do you really and honestly think any woman in the music industry would ever attack another woman about their body shape? Next time, write the whole line, not just what appeals for your point.

Random thought about feminists

I don’t consider myself a feminist. Why? Because I make way too many, “Woman, get in the kitchen and make me some food,” jokes to my mom, aunt, and friends. I make so many woman jokes that when I’m around my sister in law, I have to watch what I say unless those around us want to hear an argument. My sister in law will be the first to jump up and defend women’s right – and that is perfectly fine! I have also met another “feminist” and she really left a sour taste in my mouth because of how she treats some women. She claims to be a feminist but then bashes other women, who she feels, doesn’t live up to her standards. Being married really has taught me I am more traditional than I thought I was. I enjoy cleaning up after my husband Christian, cooking for him every day, picking up groceries, doing laundry. In fact, I rather be in charge of all the chores in our household. I would never want my husband to ever pick up a dirty sock to wash unless I asked him to. Part of the reason is because he won’t do these house hold tasks correctly… the way I picture him doing it… in my mind. I actually take great pride in catering to his every need. The household – “the kitchen” – is my domain. Now, if any feminists want to attack me and say I’m setting women back to the 1940’s, congratulations, you have just lost your feminist card. Feminists are supposed to support other women and fight for other women to do as they please. Well, I am extremely pleased and proud to channel my inner 1940’s housewife.

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courtesy of pininterest.com

Before you uptight and judgmental people begin criticizing me, “Well, you don’t work,” let me inform you that before we moved to a new state, I was working full time and still enjoyed keeping my role as the woman of the house.

My husband has never pressured me to stay home and do housework, I simply choose to take care of our home. He is always willing to lend a helping hand but – get ready to attack me, America – I don’t believe housework is a man’s job. However, what may work for us may not work for others. I prefer to take care of every and any task that involves our home. Christian works hard, gets deployed, so when he is on stand down, I like him to come home and relax and enjoy his time down while I bring him a sandwich and his drink. I like putting his needs before mine because my needs can get met the months I am alone. Again, this is the system we have because we’re both happy with this. I don’t want to come off that he is lazy because there are times I do have him help me. I’ll ask him to sweep, give Potato (our puppy) a bath, take her on walks, clear the table and set up for dinner, bring me all his dirty laundry so I’m not fishing for what is clean or dirty. He does do things at home to help me out but I genuinely enjoy doing most of the housework. I do have a lot of say in the relationship just as much as he does, it’s a good balance. I love playing my “woman” role while he plays his “man” role. With that said, I really do need to get in the kitchen and start lunch 😀

P.S. A woman that knows her way around the kitchen and laundry will never get caught for a murder. She’ll know how to clean up the blood and she can poison you! Too far? Ahh, I’m just kidding!

Seriously, though.

=)

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